Balancing Boys

Balance, Let's see ... classes on M, W, and F; work on T, Th, F, Sat and Sun; then an attempt at homework every night except Saturday; (That's reserved night to go dancing with my girls) now when do I find time for a boy? 

Maybe at  3 a.m. when I'm drunk and micro-waving popcorn? And yes that's my dinner. 

Most of you in college or life in general usually don't have time for much.  When you do have a night of freedom it's usually spent with your friends getting hammered, chasing after your latest crush/goal, or just staying in relaxing, unless you have a boyfriend or girlfriend. 

Being in a new relationship flips your life upside down. Sometimes it's for the better, and sometimes it's just a hassle you don't need in your hectic life. Well, not yet anyways. I'm not saying being in a relationship is bad. If you have one that works and is exactly what you want, then disregard everything I am saying. 

For the rest, when someone tells you they can't be in a relationship right now or they don't want one, believe them. Know that it might not even mean they don't want you, but that they don't want what comes with the relationship. 

Balancing relationships, a hook up or crush is difficult. When you do make the time for someone in your life, it better be worth it. That time is precious and whoever occupies that time should mean something.  

Don't waste time on someone who's not willing to do the same for you. If a guy says he doesn't want a relationship, but still wants to date you, it might not be so bad. Calling someone your girlfriend or boyfriend is just a title, a label. It doesn't define what you have with someone, you can figure it out on  your own terms.

Now, back to balancing. 

These are some tips I have learned and gathered on the way to balancing your life with a new crush, hook up, or boyfriend. It's important to remember that just because you really like them, they're hot, and look really good in those fitted jeans that hang off their waist, doesn't mean you give up your life for them. 

1. Don't cancel plans or routine's you do on a daily basis to be with him. If you don't keep your workout schedule he won't want you anyways. :) 

2. Don't blow off responsibilities. Skipping work, forgetting you had to babysit your little brother last night, or that you had to help your friend out with her mid-term project is not ok. He'll understand you have responsibilities and might like some space for himself too. 

3. Don't forget your friend's. I can't say this enough, KEEP YOU FRIEND'S! It is so important to maintain the relationships you already have.  A new boy is just that, a new boy. Those friends have been there for you when you were single and alone, remember that when you think about ditching them for the new guy.

4. Plan dates at certain times and places. Don't just ask to do something last minute. It starts to become a habit and then your spending so much time with them you don't even realize it. Make dates and spread them out. This isn't a marathon and balance is key to any relationship, including friends and family.

5. Make time for yourself. I know you want to see him, even as your reading this, but you have to breathe take a step back and be confident that the time he spends with you is all he needs to like you. Too much time and he will lose interest, too little he won't think your interested. Stay home, watch a movie, read a book, just enjoy a little time for yourself too. 

So balance is important and can help anyone who is struggling with their overpowering feelings for someone. If you remember that you have your own life too and that if this new boy doesn't work out then you still have something to go back to. 

Oh boys, twenty three boys, or 59, 37, 334, whatever it is, there isn't enough in this world to satisfy us WOMEN. See you next time, next problem, next stupid boy.

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Alexa